Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Thank God I Can't Vote

This clip leaves out Letterman's best jab, which is that McCain looks like the man at the hardware store who makes the keys. He really does. They should probably turn this into some kind of advantage, with a stupid nickname and a cheesy ad campaign.

"Only one man can make the keys to ensure America's prosperity and safety", and then show him handing out keys, preferably to children who smile.

Point is, I think McCain is really an excellent man. Talk shows are probably much more important to me than policy, and if he weren't so insane on the war, whoa daddy. It's a dangerous proposition. He really is a liberal's worst nightmare, though this liberal's worst nightmare is two totally unhot gay guys getting married and ruining it for the rest.

For the present, because Mommy and Daddy are fighting, McCain is allowed to relax and define himself exactly as he wishes. The Olberman's aren't doing much damage. When he picks a running mate and as we get towards the general it's possible he'll drape himself in conservatism and become more depressingly Republican. He may actually not give a fuck though. Watch out.

Breaking news: Bill O'Reilly says 'Obama' like my Nana used to say pie, or cookies. Would you like some Obama? Would you? Fix yourself a piece.

1 comment:

Justin said...

He definitely missed his calling in stand up comedy.

"You look like the guy who single mothers start dating after their second divorce."