You feel like you know these people, but you don't. You let them into your home more than anyone else, but they very rarely get inside you. Only the losses of the ones who've gotten under your skin feel like a wound. So this goes out to Heath Ledger, Suicide Rex of the moment, where ever and whyever he may be.
Ennis Del Mar will stay with me the rest of my life and is the reason why I took the foolish death of a total stranger to my heart. BROKEBACK already ruined me because of the ways in which I haven't lived my life to the fullest, but I'll be pulling out Santolalla's score today. If you haven't heard it on it's own, it's a beautiful piece of music and a very good thing to have handy. Though save it for when you're old enough to feel totally devastated. I'll be walking this morning, not in his honor but just one more thing to do than him. To buy a pack of cigarettes. Far be it from me to assess my own self-destructive behavior, yet. As I crest the hill down into the still dark town that guitar will very likely carry with it all the sadness in the world. Fuckin' movie stars.